关于狗熊还是熊猫吃了1W舰队
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刚才看见一个关于狗熊的事,差点笑翻:han3:
(19 August 2007, Serbia) It's well known that alcohol impairs judgement. It's well known that carnivorous wild animals and humans don't mix. What happens when we combine all three? One might expect men, beer, and bears to combine with lethal consequences. Such was the case for a 23-year old man who inadvertently fed himself to Masha and Misha at the Belgrade Zoo.
The Zoo director said of the incident,
"Only an idiot would jump into the bear cage."The man's naked, mauled corpse was found inside the bear habitat, along with several mobile phones, bricks, and plenty of beer cans. His clothes were completely undamaged, suggesting that he approached the bears bare-naked by choice. The bears, fearing that his intentions were as dishonorable as they were ill-informed, meted out a summary justice.
Later, Masha and Misha "reacted angrily" when keepers tried to recover the man's corpse, but were eventually persuaded to give up their tasty prize. We await word on how many beers were bartered for the body.
中文:
众所周知酒精影响判断力,大家也都知道食肉野生动物和人类不会混合.如果我们把这三者结合起来会发生什么呢?或许你会期待人,熊,啤酒混合出一个致命的结果.这个23岁的年轻人粗心大意地把自己喂给了Belgrade 动物园的 Masha 和 Misha. 动物园负责人评论说, "只有傻子弱智才会跳进熊笼." 这个年轻人的裸体在熊笼中被发现,身上伤痕累累,周围还有一些手机,砖头和啤酒瓶.他的衣服完好无损,这说明他是有选择的裸体接近熊笼的.因为没受过太多教育,熊们怀疑他图谋不轨,并作出了一个致命的宣判. 稍后,当人们试图取回这青年的尸体时,Masha 和 Misha 作出了 "愤怒的回应" .但最终它们放弃了美味的战利品.我们希望知道到底用多少瓶啤酒换回了尸体. -
这里还有个关于兔子的,不过米中文:defy:
Snowmobiles and alcohol are a dangerous mix. Then came the rabbit.
After a day spent partying and racing snowmobiles in the wilderness, a group of snowmobilers headed back to their cabin. Up popped a jackrabbit! The snowmobilers gave chase. Several collisions were narrowly averted, and all snowmobiles backed off... except one.
This snowmobiler kept his eye on the quarry and rapidly closed in. The rabbit darted aside to save itself. The snowmobiler closed in again. The rabbit ran toward the road, where there was less snow. Trying to ram his rabbit before it crossed the road, the man accelerated to Mach 1. But the rabbit had other ideas. It escaped into the culvert beneath the road.
Witnesses stated that the snowmobiler never braked. There was a metallic crunch as the accelerating vehicle rammed into the culvert, followed by a blast that shattered the snowmobile into a thousand bits.
This brand of snowmobile had a fuel tank mounted in front. The culvert admitted the tip of the snowmobile, then cut into the cowling, spilling fuel over the hot engine. The body of the snowmobiler was blown twenty feet back into the field.
The rabbit's whereabouts was unknown.
Moderator Bruce speculates, "Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd?"
Alternate title: "Hare Today, Gone Tomorrow"